“I remember everything until I woke up in the hospital.”
She closed her eyes.
“Matt, I was there that night.”
I frowned.
“Of course you were. You were the one I pushed out of the car’s path.”
“No,” she said, shaking her head. “I mean… I wasn’t just the girl you saved.”
Her voice broke.
“I was the driver of the car.”
For a moment, I couldn’t understand what she had said.
I stared at her, waiting for her to explain.
“What?”
She wiped her cheeks.
“That night, I had borrowed my father’s car. I was driving home after visiting a friend. It was raining heavily, and I was going too fast. I saw you and the girl standing near the road. I slammed on the brakes, but the car skidded.”
My heart began pounding.
“The girl?”
She looked directly into my eyes.
“Me, Matt. I was the girl.”
The room seemed to disappear around me.
I remembered the headlights. The screeching tires. The terrible impact.
And then I remembered something else.
A flash of a face.
A frightened young woman standing in the rain.
“You were the one I pushed?” I whispered.
She nodded.
“I survived with bruises. You were rushed to the hospital. The police questioned me, and my father hired lawyers. I told them everything. I wanted to visit you, but I was terrified. I kept thinking about what I had done to you.”
I swallowed hard.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because I was a coward.”
She lowered her head.
“The first time I visited you, you were unconscious. The second time, you had just woken up. I heard the doctor explaining that you might never walk again. I couldn’t stand there knowing I was the reason your life had changed forever.”
I remembered that visit.
Her trembling voice.
Her words: Matt, I can’t do this.
I had thought she was leaving because I was disabled.
But she had been running from something much worse.
“I spent years hating myself,” she continued. “I tried to find out how you were doing, but I never had the courage to face you. Then, months ago, I found your cooking blog.”
She gave a sad little smile.
“I recognized your hands. I recognized your sense of humor. And then I saw your name.”
I stared at her.
“So you knew?”
“Not at first. I wanted to believe it was someone else. But when you told me your name was Matt, I knew.”
She squeezed my hand.
“I started talking to you because I wanted to apologize. But then something happened. I started falling in love with the man behind the screen. The man who made me laugh. The man who could turn a burnt cake into a funny story.”
She paused.
“And the more I got to know you, the more terrified I became of telling you the truth.”
I pulled my hand away.
“So all those conversations… all those months… were you trying to make yourself feel better?”
She shook her head desperately.
“No! At first, maybe I wanted forgiveness. But that changed. I wasn’t pretending when I told you I missed you. I wasn’t pretending when I stayed up talking to you until two in the morning. I wasn’t pretending when I started looking forward to every message.”
“Then why did you run yesterday?”
Her eyes filled again.
“Because when I walked into that café and saw you sitting in that wheelchair, I realized something.”
She took a shaky breath.
“I wasn’t looking at a stranger who happened to use a wheelchair. I was looking at the man whose life I had destroyed.”
I felt something inside me crack.
She continued.
“I thought I had finally found a way to tell you the truth. But when I saw you, all I could hear was the sound of that crash. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t look at you. I ran because I couldn’t face what I had done.”
For a long time, I said nothing.
Then I asked the question that had been burning inside me.
“Did you ever love me, Hannah? Or was I just another way for you to ask forgiveness?”
She began crying harder.
“I don’t know how to prove it to you. I only know that I love you. And I know I have no right to ask you to forgive me.”