“Because Amelia just stopped their family ceremony in front of everyone.”
I stood.
“What do you mean stopped it?”
“You won’t believe what Amelia just did. You need to get here.”
“I mean everyone is standing around staring at her, Ryan looks like somebody slapped him, and your mother doesn’t know what to say.”
That almost scared me more than anything else.
My mother always knew what to say.
“What did Amelia do?”
That almost scared me more than anything else.
Nora lowered her voice.
“Annie, get over here. You need to see this yourself.”
“Nora, what happened?”
Her voice dropped. “Amelia needs you.”
That was enough.
I called the neighbor across the street, a woman my children had known since they were babies.
“Annie, get over here. You need to see this yourself.”
Ten minutes later, I reached the venue expecting to find Amelia sobbing.
Instead, half the family stood whispering near the ballroom doors.
***
Nora met me first.
“Where is she?” I panted.
“Outside.”
I started toward the garden corridor.
Then Nora caught my arm.
Half the family stood whispering near the ballroom doors.
“Annie, you need to know what happened before you see her.”
I turned.
Nora glanced toward the ballroom.
“They had this little family ceremony after the vows.”
“What family ceremony?”
“A unity candle.”
I already hated the sound of that.
“Annie, you need to know what happened before you see her.”
Nora continued.
“Ryan and Lina had one candle. Amelia had another. She was supposed to light hers from theirs.”
“Why?”
Nora gave me a tired look.
“Apparently it was supposed to symbolize their new family.”
Of course. They wanted Amelia beside them as proof of their new family.
“She was supposed to light hers from theirs.”
Nora said, “Lina told Amelia that lighting the candle meant they were all becoming one family.”
I looked at her.
“And?”
“Amelia asked where you go.”
I gripped the edge of the chair.
“What?”
Nora repeated it.
“She said, ‘If this makes us one family, where does Mom go?'”
“Amelia asked where you go.”
I clamped my hand over my mouth.
Nora continued before I could speak.
“Ryan crouched down and told her you weren’t going anywhere, that you’re still her mother.”
“Then?”
“Then Amelia asked why you weren’t included in the family part.”
I couldn’t answer that either.
Apparently neither could Ryan.
“Then Amelia asked why you weren’t included in the family part.”
Nora gave a helpless little laugh.
“And then your mother tried to fix it.”
“Oh God.”
“She told Amelia that grown-ups sometimes have different families.”
I already knew what came next from the look on Nora’s face.
“Amelia looked at her and said, ‘You told Mom family supports family.'”
“She told Amelia that grown-ups sometimes have different families.”
I sat down on a chair beside the corridor.
Nora crouched in front of me.
“Then she asked why Lina didn’t have to support you.”
I stared at the floor.
“Then she asked why Lina didn’t have to support you.”
My nine-year-old had apparently taken one sentence my mother had used against me for months and asked the only question none of them wanted answered.
But Nora wasn’t finished.
My nine-year-old had apparently taken one sentence my mother had used against me.
***
“Then Amelia picked up her candle instead of lighting it,” she recalled. “Ryan told her they needed it for the ceremony. She said, ‘It’s mine,’ and walked out with it.”
That got me moving again.
“Where is she?”
“Garden bench. Ryan’s with her.”
I pushed through the doors.
“Where is she?”
Outside, I found Amelia sitting with her white candle in both hands.
Ryan was beside her.
He still had his suit jacket on.
The boutonniere on his chest looked absurdly cheerful.
Neither of them noticed me at first.
“You said you were okay with the candle,” Ryan said.
“You said you were okay with the candle.”
Amelia stared at it.
“You asked if I understood it, Dad.”
Ryan went quiet.
“That’s not the same thing,” she added.
Ryan was saying, “Why didn’t you tell me you felt like this?”
Amelia stared at the candle.
“You didn’t ask.”
“Why didn’t you tell me you felt like this?”
Ryan frowned.
“I ask you things all the time.”
“You ask if school was good.”
He went quiet.
“You ask if I like Aunt Lina’s apartment.”
Another pause.
“You ask if dinner tastes good.”
Ryan looked down.
Amelia’s voice got smaller.
“You don’t ask if I’m mad.”
“I ask you things all the time.”
I stopped several feet away.
Ryan finally said, “Are you mad at me?”
Amelia nodded.
Just once.
Ryan looked at her for a long time.
He took a breath and nodded once. “Okay.”
I had never heard him answer her like that before.
No excuse.
No “someday you’ll understand.”
Just okay.
I had never heard him answer her like that before.
Then Amelia saw me.
“Mom!”
She dropped the candle onto the bench and ran.
I knelt as she crashed into me.
“Mom, I ruined Dad’s wedding.”
“No, baby.”
“I did.”
“You got upset.” I pulled her back enough to see her face. “That is not the same thing.”
“Mom, I ruined Dad’s wedding.”
Ryan stood behind her.
“Annie…”
I looked at him.
“Don’t.”
He stopped.
Amelia wiped her cheeks.
Then, out of nowhere, she said, “Everybody keeps saying there were six of us.”
I looked at Ryan.
He looked confused too.
